Daydreams: Dissatisfaction with your life?

lights live

The small conference room is sweaty because of the amount of nervous people crammed into it.  A Fortune 500 client is in the room, and the team is presenting our results for the past 3 months.  A quarterly review – our chance to justify why a client should keep paying us money for our work.

… Lights flash and I’m standing in front of a crowd of people.  I pick up my guitar, hit the chords, and the crowd sings along to my music.  Cameras flash, camcorders record, and I bask in the glory.  I get ready to play my solo and…

“Jun… Jun… It’s your turn to present”

Damn, just another day dream…

I saw Lights play in Hollywood last week:

There was a moment during the performance when she stopped and said, “The label put a different version of this song on the album, but I’m going to play it for you the way she wants to be played.


Her music means so much to her that she humanizes it.  I realized that she would be playing her music regardless of the fame or money.  Her music is her life, and she would be happy playing it from anywhere in the world.

At that moment I thought to myself, “What do I love that much in this world?”  Is there something that I do that brings me this same level of satisfaction and happiness that I would do it regardless of money or recognition?  I’m sure like many of you, I still can’t answer that question

I daydream a lot.  Sometimes I’m dunking on Lebron James, and other times I’m break dancing at the Red Bull Finals.  Does daydreaming mean I’m dissatisfied with my life?  Do artists dream about starting their own web startup like I dream about playing at sold out venues?

Lets take it one step further: If I successfully sold my company for millions, would I still find myself daydreaming another life?

Daydreams do signify a hint of dissatisfaction

For example, before I was with Kim, I would daydream about being with girls all day long.  Now that I’m with Kim, I’ve come to realize that I don’t daydream about girls at all anymore.  Sure Taylor Swift and Christina Ricci pop into my head from time to time, but I honestly don’t wonder what it would be like to be with someone else.

So if my feelings about relationships parallel my inner most feelings about my career, then I should not be daydreaming about living another life.  I should not be wishing that I was 8 inches taller, that I could sing, or that I didn’t have two left feet.

Accept your DNA

I feel that in order to find happiness in life, we must do these two things:

  1. Embrace your DNA – Gary Vaynerchuk
  2. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses – Tim Ferriss

Loving who I am and accepting the attributes that I have been given is very hard.  I hope that one day I’ll be able to come out of a daydream and realize that I’m actually living it.

Published by

Jun Loayza

Jun Loayza is the Chief Growth Officer at Bunny Inc. In his startup experience, he has sold 2 technology companies and raised $1M in angel funding. Jun lives in San Francisco, CA with his wife Kim.

7 thoughts on “Daydreams: Dissatisfaction with your life?”

  1. I like it Jun! I day dream ALL THE TIME and it’s the best personal entertainment I can imagine.

    Day dreaming is just one’s goals reflected in an animated way.

    Winning the WSOP and $8.6 million? Hell yeah!

    Selling your site for big bucks? Oh yeah!

    Anybody who doesn’t day dream is an empty shell. Gotta dream, and dream big!

    Financial Samurai

  2. I think that day dreams are a part of life. It pushes us to work harder and achieve our dreams.

    I think at times we can get lost in them and it may or may not be healthy for us. It really depends.

    For me, I love my daydreams because I can be anyone I want. It’s a way for me to escape my current stresses and relax for a bit.

  3. Accept your DNA… first time I’ve heard that.

    I find myself always wishing I had more talent, or a single talent for that matter. I feel like I’m just going to school, going to get a job, get married… and die!!!

    What can I do?

  4. Hiya Jun – from your point about solving your daydreams about girls by finding Kim – shouldn’t you solve your daydreaming about jobs by finding the right job?

  5. Oh my. I hope I am not daydreaming that much. Kidding aside, I used to daydream a lot too but I kinda loved it because it allows me to explore how far my imagination can get. The weirder and farther I get, the more creative I believe I am. But daydreaming about myself, on the other hand, I guess, is another form of self-denial. I remember my psych class–hope you won’t get bored with this–where my teacher told us that our dreams are our innermost desires, conscious or not (most of the times, not). So daydreaming could be another form for that–an expression or outlet of our desires. And we have these because we haven’t achieved what we love to get. Hmmm….it really does make sense.

    Thanks, new friend, for sharing these helpful tips to us. I still have a lot to go before I completely accept my DNA…but I am getting there. 🙂


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