Young Successful Entrepreneur

Photo by Zara

I am an idea reproducing machine.  My most recent idea involves an online show/diary hosted by two good looking girls about fashion.  I know I am biased but I honestly feel this idea is genius.  Women love fashion, men love watching good looking girls, and the revenue potential that can be generated is insane!  We wouldn’t even have to have that many unique visitors a month before we could start generating revenue through advertisements or sponsorships.

I have written before about how my girlfriend and I have completely different personalities.  She is laid back, relaxed, and lets life come to her.  I’m an intense A-type personality who is a go-getter and can spend all day working.

I feel like everyday is a battle between the two of us.  She wants to cuddle, watch a movie, and go to Disneyland, while I want to work, work, and do more work.  So, I came up with a brilliant idea!  My girlfriend is going to be the host for the fashion show/diary idea that I have.  Furthermore, she has a good friend named Kat who will co-host with her. It’s brilliant in theory, but it’s the execution that is going to be difficult.

I’ve only worked with a girlfriend once before in my life.  I was a Junior in High School and I worked with my girlfriend at the time at Wetzel’s Pretzels.  Yes… very lame.  Working with her was a complete disaster!  We would argue everyday and come home together only to argue more.  It seemed to me at the time that it is impossible for a couple to work together.

So here I am going to try it again, hopefully wiser from maturity and experience.  So how can you do it?  How can you start a business with your girlfriend (or boyfriend) and maintain a healthy relationship without ripping each other apart?

This is the way to successfully start a business with your significant other:

Feedback sounds like criticism

One of the startup tips that I push the most is that you and your team should argue with each other and give feedback to each other as much as possible.  Every idea that is brought up should be attacked and destroyed until only the best ideas survive.  Don’t leave a meeting until all debates have been settled and actionable steps are laid out.

This is great for a startup company, but terrible for a company with your girlfriend.  Your girlfriend takes everything you say to heart, and if you destroy her idea, she will feel discouraged and never bring up another idea again.  Worse, she’ll get mad at you and start a fight.

What to do: Understand that no matter what, any feedback that is not positive will be taken as an attack by your girlfriend.  Positive criticism is the keyword to hold onto here.  Every critique that you give must be given in a positive light.

“Babe, you did so great on the last photo shoot.  You look absolutely stunning.  I have an idea for the next one.  Lets try to add more energy and movement.  What do you think?”

Is it overkill?  Maybe, but I’d rather look and sound cheesy than get into an argument.

Make sure that you allocate time away from the business

My style of work is to work while at home, at the gym, at the theme park, or in the car.  If you’re out surfing with your business partner, then you should talk about the company while sitting on the waves.  If you’re in a car ride together, then it’s time to debate over one of your ideas.

It is completely different with your girlfriend.

When you’re at Disneyland, BE at Disneyland.  I made that mistake today by being in line at Disneyland and asking my girlfriend what her ideas are for the video series.  If you’re at the movie theater, it’s the same exact story.  Focus on the moment and on the movie.  When you get back home in front of your laptop. that’s the time to start focusing on work again.  To your girlfriend, everything has a time and place.

Have everything written down from the beginning

This point is important in any company.  Yes, she is your girlfriend so you feel that you can trust her with anything; however, realize that this is a business and it can ruin any relationship.  Make sure that equity, positions, responsibilities, and time commitments are written down from the very beginning.  Also, make sure that equity is distributed evenly over a 3 year period.  Therefore, if your girlfriend leaves the company before her three years, then she only gets the equity that she has accrued.

Don’t let your love fool you.  Having everything written down from the very beginning is one of the most important steps in a startup company.

She (He) is your girlfriend (boyfriend) first and business partner second

Always treat your girlfriend as your girlfriend, and never like you would treat your business partner.  For example, I argue with Yu-kai all the time and tell him he looks funny on video.  I remind him to contact a client, make sure that he’s doing work, poke fun at him when he writes a blog post, and purposely disagree with him on ideas because I feel I have to.  No idea should get by without a beating.

My girlfriend Kim cannot be treated this way.  She would go home and cry and hate me forever.  If you want your girlfriend to work with you, you must make sure to have the utmost patience, treat her lovingly at all times, and never work her to the ground.  Encouragement is the key.

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Keep a look out for the site that will be launching in a couple of weeks.  I think you’ll all be pleasantly surprised and be hooked from the first show!

If you have any comments or questions about being in a relationship with your girlfriend or boyfriend, I would love to hear them!